A year or so back two of our favorite people, Neil and Maritza, called.
Maritza said "We'd like you to marry us."
"OK, but I'm already married. You'll have to check with Tiel first."
"No, you *bad words in Spanish*. We're getting married, and we want you to do the ceremony."
I'm not a judge. The IRS dropped the Big Hammer on the Universal Life Church some time back. Yeshiva would probably take too long, and besides I don't look good in a beard. A quick web search turned up the Church of Spiritual Humanism, a sort of grandchild of Unitarianism. Free ordination with a wide choice of titles. Unfortunately "Crazed Degenerate Cultist of the Great Old Ones" wasn't on the list. Close enough, though.
Enough time went by that the wedding became a running joke. Then a couple weeks ago Neil said that they'd set the date for October 7, right in the middle of the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival. Greater love hath no man than to forgo the pleasures of Great Cthulhu for his friends. Something came up, and the wedding was moved to the 14th.
The bride was beautiful and nervous. The groom was surprisingly laid back. The women of his family put together the reception meal. Nobody fumbled his or her lines. Tiel read a poem from Rumi that started with "Love comes with a knife" which pleased the couple and shocked the audience. Neil gave back the engagement ring which we had lent him after he lost the old one in an accident.
The paperwork got filled out and mailed off to the proper authorities. We were gratified to see that "race" is no longer required on the license application. When we got married some fifteen years ago it caused problems and required some friendly Legislators and a new State law to change that bit.
It's great to see them finally married. Congratulations and long life to the new couple.